[I totally know readers of this blog aren’t this crazy so forward/email it to women you know who are this crazy. Thank you! P.S. This is just part 1 explored with other black women -- next time will be other WOC]
Topic of Examination: Black women who feel more comfortable when they know that a guy is into IR through his relationships. So comfortable in fact that they don’t care if he is in one at the moment and will start to romance him.
This hasn’t happened to me but I hear about it on a lot of IR forums. People hint at it but no one really has expanded on this happening. I think it’s because most of us online are IR option sisterhood-ing and would never do that to each other and will rail on the other women who want to do that in forums but I have never seen a full topic trying to understand WHY or warn women that they are going to get cut.
Though process 1#: Yes, this guy is IR tested, you will not be the first. So if you are scared to be with a guy who has not be IR approved then here you go.
Thought process 2#: Maybe you are one of those black women who are always in competition with other black women and want to prove that you are better quality than the sistah with the guy...all of that and a designer handbag of hating.
Though process 3#: You were on the IR fringe, thinking about it but not really sure whether or not you really wanted to go for it. He pushes you over the edge and you think a combination of either 1# or 2# or both.
Thought process 4#: You are up to getting cut.
Bottom-line: going out with a guy who has either gone out with black women, (especially if he is currently in a relationship with one) is not a sure fire way to get into a relationship. I wouldn’t recommend it either.
Use the fact that there are real IR relationships out there to open your eyes to the fact that you never know who is open to IR and then keep it moving as you find your own man.
Seriously girl 4# is a harsh and jagged reality.
Hi Crushed,this really has nothing to do with the article but have you been watching the TNT show "Franklin & Bash"? It's about two non-traditional lawyers that are recruited by the head of a big law firm to liven up the place. And the theres two main female characters. Both are black! One's a love interest. The other is their best friend. I was really surprised with this show because throughout the episodes you'll see plenty of scenes with the two black females and one of the boys talking or working on cases and such. Essentially normalizing the friendship and relationship that a non-black guy can have with black women. I give real props to the show!
ReplyDeleteThanks Diana!
ReplyDeleteI checked out the show randomly but just to look at the description but if it is that intense I want to do more with it. Plus, I love the lead guys, especially Zach~~ LOL I totally know his name but I just loved him too much on Saved by the Bell he was one of my first loves. ^^