- You do not have to apologize or explain your preference.
- You do not have to insult other people in order to have a preference. Especially not black women or else you will get mauled.
- You do not have to fill a quota of people outside your preference in order to have a preference and prove that you are not self hating.
I think that these three things really encompass what having a preference is about. It’s about YOU! Not about anyone else.
Sweet Rant: I really don’t get upset when I am not the individual preference of people or if black women in general are not their thing. I just tell them: "step aside for the cute guy behind you to come through." What gets me mad is when people add the “black women are not my preference because of XYZ stereotypes or dark skinned women are not my preference because of XYZ.” STOP MAKING UP EXCUSES! If you have a preference use etiquette because through showing respect for others you show respect for yourself. Or just shut up with your hater-ade and love who you love without bringing other people down.
"step aside for the cute guy behind you to come through."
ReplyDeleteHahaha, I like that line, I should use it more often :)
lol, loooove ""step aside for the cute guy behind you to come through."
ReplyDeleteWow :) It's quite amazing that I came across this post today as I was revisiting this "issue" with myself today.
ReplyDeleteI have a tendency to be attracted to people outside of my race and I remember being guilt ridden and wondering what was wrong with me and feeling utterly ashamed about it, like I was "rejecting my own kind". Then I realized I'm attracted to men of all races, including my own. I just seemed to have a preference for white males(although now I see I just have a preference for people who are..."different' :-P ).
I realized that I was so guilt ridden because I felt like I had to explain why I like what I like. There's not any one thing in particular... Of course it's all about personality but even physically, each race has such diversity within it and each race has traits that are beautiful and different from the next and deserve appreciation.
Like what you like and don't feel guilty about it.
good post. i esp. like the part about etiquette. i.e- i know a non-blk guy that is into blk women, as long as they're not dark-skinned....ugh. can't say i'm too surprised since he has many BM friends..but, let's say this non-blk guy has kids w/a light-skinned blk woman and the kids come out darker than the mother? ppl don't think about genetics with their ignorance.
ReplyDeleteGreat post!!
ReplyDelete"You do not have to fill a quota of people outside your preference in order to have a preference and prove that you are not self hating."
...yeah I've noticed that I do a bit of that every now and again. It's all about paying less attention(or none at all) to others opinions and more on living your own life.
Great post, and very refreshing to see someone else who feels the way I do. I can't stand people who feel the need to explain who they date, married or are attracted to. All they achieve is to make a fool of themselves and their date or significant other, and offend others - when all they really needed to do in the first place was keep their mouths shut and live their lives.
ReplyDelete